by Hinda Tzivia Eisen, summer 2013.

I feel insignificant.

When God is infinite, and there are seven billion people in the world, how much audacity must I have to believe that God pays attention to me? How selfish to think I deserve for Him to heed me.

And yet, I do. I do believe that I am in God’s consciousness. I do believe He checks in on me when I call. And also when I am not looking — like a parent who checks in on a sleeping child.

So I vacillate between feeling deeply tiny in this Universe, and feeling a bloated sense that my God is with me.

Even in the best of times we must choose the torch we carry wisely, and we must be careful who we choose to illumine.